My country just voted Donald Trump to be our 45th President.

I am terrified, horrified, ashamed, incredulous, nauseous, anxious, on and on and on and I can assure you none of it is good. How did he win? How the hell am I supposed to deal with this cesspool of emotions about my country? How am I supposed to handle the dread that hangs like a weight vest designed to drag me down? How am I supposed to come to terms with the fact that this is the America our children will grow up in over the next four years (not to mention the many years we will need to clean up this mess)?

How am I supposed to swallow this pill? What are my options here? I suppose I can either accept this outcome, or somehow try to run away from it. Canada perhaps? I know the driving force behind most of my emotions and questions is fear. I am terrified of what this means for my rights, for the rights of my friends and family, for the rights of humans everywhere on this planet. I don’t know yet what this presidency will include, but the fear of the unknown is what drives me to want to run. I am horrified of the changes Trump will (try to) impose on our country, and the impact he will have on individuals and countries around the world.

What exactly is a Trump presidency going to look like? How will this affect my rights as a member of the LGBTQ+ community? How will this affect my rights as someone with female anatomy? How will this affect my rights as a gender non-conforming individual? How will this affect the rights of people around the country that Trump has repeatedly misrepresented, neglected, mocked and even expressed blatant hatred toward? This list could go on forever, but that is not the point here. The point is: what can I do about it?

I don’t know the answer to any of these questions. All I know is that I need to write these feelings down. I need to remember this moment so that every time I am given an option to stand up for my rights I have the strength to do so. Today is for mourning. Tomorrow is for action. I will not let this terribly unfortunate election result bring me down. I am going to continue to vote on my beliefs, I am going to continue to stand up for my rights, and I am going to continue simply to try to be a good person – even if our president isn’t one.

I hope you will join me.

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About The Author


E is a 26 year old genderqueer New York native. E is a school administrator, volunteer for the Human Rights Campaign, freelance writer, and collector of stories for their project: GenderQueerY.

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